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First I’ll start with my confession… I’m sitting at the coffee shop right now having skipped church on this beautiful Sunday morning. I’m not even drinking coffee but only because the line at Fido (one of my old time favorite coffee shops) has been uber long since the minute I walked in this morning.
Now that the 1st confession is out of the way let’s get to the second one. I’m feeling bi-polar these days. Bursts of inspirations mixed with lots of lack of motivation and inspiration. It’s probably normal I know but it feel little extreme to me right now. I’ve got a lot of stuff going on, some really great opportunities coming up but sometimes day to day in hard. Feels like a grind, you know? Yea, you know.
So i’m wanting to ask myself, you, and God… what is the most faithful way to live when life feels like your days are hard, when you feel like life is a grind? Do you stop what your doing and do something else? Do you just keep plugging away? You figure out what needs to change? Do you take a spiritual retreat? Pray more? Read you bible more? Just stop and trust God cause there is nothing you can do? Or none of the above OR all of the above???
I ask this because not only do I feel this dilemma from time to time but I consistently hear this as the dilemma of friends and strangers… Life is hard, right.
I’ve got no answer on this gorgeous Sunday afternoon. It’s one of those Sunday’s that make you feel like life is good and what could possibly be wrong. But the beauty of this day is just a distraction from the bank accounts, marriages, relationships, projects, failure, stalled out lives that seems to be difficult more than not.
So this Sunday I’m reading this and asking, “how do we live faithfully when life feels like one big trail?
Reading and pondering this…
“Consider it pure joy brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, becaseu yo know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. And if any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you.”
Wondering if there isn’t some wisdom for the moment here…
Grace and peace
erik
My summer is officially over! That’s always bitter sweet right. I mean, i LOVE the ministry i do during the summer. Camps and festivals, different stuff like that. I really enjoy it, i started following Jesus at a summer camp so it’s pretty humbling and amazing to be able to participate in that ministry from the other the side, as the weird guy who is doing the talking about Jesus. I really do love it. BUT it’s always pretty taxing. LOTS of travel (my last trip i drove about 44 hours, WOW) Lots of time away from family which is WAY harder now that i have a kid. This was a mild summer, i only had 3 camps but i was still gone 34 for days. Much less than a few summers ago but still a lot with a 6 month old crawling around!
So yea, i’m glad the summers over but it was a great summer!
I’m working on a summer newsletter. The email will probably go out right around the 1st of September. If your not on my eNewsletter list, SIGN UP HERE!
Looking back i have been a pretty huge blog slacker around here this sumer. It feels like i’ve taken a blogging sabbatical or something. Which has kinda been nice! But i also miss it. I enjoy blogging! Sharing my thoughts, my randomness, and a little bit of the life i’m living. I’m enjoy living in community, this blog a is a little part of that.
But now it’s time to gear up for the fall! Which could be a the name of a rad album right, “gearing up for the fall” but instead it’s just what i’m doing. Lot’s of projects to be working on, events to prepare for, and a life to be lived! ??I look forward to sharing along the way!
grace and peace
erik
At one point in time i was a huge listener to the Relevant Podcast. But the novelty wore off and the podcast episodes kinda became hit or miss… mostly miss to be honest. I am a subscriber the magazine and really love what Relevant does (i even hope to contribute someday).
Recently i started listening to their Neue podcast. Just select episodes online.
In case you don’t know Neue is Relevant magazine’s publication for Church leadership and specific ministry / church content. It’s pretty good from the little i’ve ready but i really have started to enjoy their podcast. I’ve only listened to a handful of them so far but their good and address things that pastors and leaders will benefit from.
My favorites so far…
NT Wright Conversation :: In this podcast NT (Tom) talks about his book After You Believe: Why Christian Character Matters. My favorite part of this podcast was to hear NT Wright talk about the bible! So refreshing to hear a color wearing Anglican Bishop talk about the scripture with a sparkle in his eye and love in his voice! The more i enter the Anglican world the more i run into people like this. I LOVE IT! And NT Wright represents well! Listen to this one, you’ll enjoy it!
Pete Wilson Conversation :: I know Pete (he has a blog) and he is a good dude! He recently wrote a book (that i hope to read if i can get Pete to give me a copy!!! ;-) And he talks a bit about this book and really just talks about his heart as a pastor and the culture of honesty he is creating among his pastoral staff at Cross Point. I love it and think many churches could learn from Pete’s leadership / staffing model. A good chat for sure, you’ll enjoy this one as well.
Those are my 2 favorites so far.
You can also read previous issues of Neue magazine right there on their website, which is pretty sweet!
Check it out!
grace and peace
erik
This is a pretty interesting things that happened.
Most churches in the US would be appalded for doing WHATEVER it takes to get people in the door and the building full. This guy was suspended.
Your thoughts…
And if you want to read the article over at ESPN and read some of the comments here’s the link :: FULL ARTICLE
Tags: discipline, priests, soccer
Last year i read Don Miller’s A Million Miles in a Thousand Years after purchasing it at a massive book store in Portland, it was my first trip to the city and i thought it fitting to buy a Donald Miller book while there! I LOVED IT! I even labeled it one of my 2 must read books of 2009. I was fascinated by Donald Miller’s narrative approach to life! Being a huge fan of narrative theology this wasn’t anything extraordinarily new but the way he communicated story and inspired the reader to start living a good one was, maybe not novel but timely for our fast food, movie watching culture. And it was written and communicated in Donald Miller’s classic fashion! A great book for sure.
Well now Don is hosting a seminar on Living a Better Story and i would LOVE to go!
Here’s a link to find out more about it :: Living A Better Story
And a sweet little video of Don if you want to hear more.
So i am submitting this little blog post / essay (below) with hopes to win the prize, a free trip to Portland!
Here goes nothing…
Writing a better story — in all kinds of ways
I feel like i have always thought telling a good story was important and unconsciously i thought i was living a good story as well. But like all good scripts the first tension and the first turn toward resolution are only the beginning.
The first chapter of my story consisted of growing up in a fatherless home, living in low-income housing while my mother worked 2 and 3 jobs at a times, having my birth name changed because the Muslim / Albanian name my absent father gave me was just going to be to hard for people to pronounce, among other reasons. I thought my tension filled young life was adequately resolved when i was introduced to Jesus in 8th grade. I became a Christian, received a “call” to vocational ministry and not long after started traveling the country preaching bible, telling the story of God in a way that hopefully challenged people to authentically follow Jesus. I believed I was living a good story.
But that was only chapter 1.
In the middle of a living my nice little story I met a girl (positive turn), i was ordained (positive turn), i moved to San Diego (positive and sunny turn).
But then… I got married (tension : trust me, tension), i got excommunicated (NEGATIVE turn), I moved to Nashville (humid turn) and i unexpectedly had a kid (uncategorizable turn).
Now i find myself at a place in life that is beautiful and hard all at the same time and i just want to make sure i am living a good story. I want to be living a good story for my beautiful wife Andrea and for my amazing son Jack. I also want to be living a good story because i want to follow Jesus, who i believe is stirring authentic and riveting stories in all of us who are open to it.
I think this conference would be an amazing time to think, dream, and take in the elements of a good story so i can, by the grace of God, live them out in my life and with my family.
My wife, who i would bring with me, is a writer who needs some stirring to get out of the magazine world and write her first book, to live the story that is bubbling in her soul! We are also praying about planting an Anglican Church, tension / turn / who knows what that is. And among all the reasons that i feel like i would benefit from the reminder to live a daring story the most important one is my son. I don’t have a clue how to be a dad but i know i want to learn to live a great story so that i can teach jack to live a great story. I want our family to live the kind of story that people want to read!
So as much as i think this conference could inspire my wife and i to risk for the sake of our vocational stories i would hope this conference to challenge and equip us to live a story as a family that will be worth writing down someday.
Here’s to Portland
(i hope we get to go!)
Grace and peace
erik
Tags: books, Don Millier, portland, story
Below is a screen shot of a post from April 10th, 2008. 3 days before my wedding!
My good friend Jake Edwards called me today. He’s getting married in a couple hours. When he called me he said, “I’ve got four hours till i get married.” And as we talked about the joy and fear, the anticipation and emotion of the day all those feelings came rushing back to me, as if i were experiencing them all over again.
I remember my train ride into the city, where i briefly shared some of my thoughts. Oh the emotion! Those 3 or 4 days were probably some of the more FULL days of my life.
I hope for my friend Jake! I hope that these days and in-particular this day will be as FULL for him as it was for me!
remembering those moments…
erik
SUMMER 2010! It has begun!
This summer is a solid summer, i have 3 camps and am talking to another. Not as busy as a few summers ago, 7 camps. And busier than last summer 2 camps. So i am pretty stoked about the summer. it’s a perfect pace with Jack here and i am really excited about some of the things i will be sharing.
Week 1, in the books!
Week 1 / Camp 1 was spent at Youthfront South.
Youtfront is a youth ministry organization doing some really cool stuff in the KC Metro area and in the youth ministry world in general.
And they do camp right!
There was a lot of great aspect to this camp (i will share some reflection in posts to come) but my favorite thing about this camp was the intentionality they had. We followed the daily office, we had huge experience times connected to the message, there was a ton of time for student reflection, staff was great, and all around there was a lot of great elements to camp. Yea, i have some critique but for the most part it was a great week, they do camp right!
And like i said, there is more reflection from week 1 to come!
Grace and peace
erik
PS :: make sure you check out Youthfront!
He Has Risen!
(and you promptly say) He Has Risen Indeed!
This was one of the few liturgical elements we observed in my church growing up, and i always loved it!
Now, going to an Anglican Church, this call and response is apart of our liturgy. A little more formal, a little less frequent, but said all the same.
PS: This was the first thing i said to my wife this morning when she woke me up.
I opened my eyes and said, “He Has Risen!” And she smiled, looked back at me and said, “He Has Risen Indeed!”
She is pretty awesome! And a wise liturgist for sure!
To cap off this easter post i thought i would include this little ditty by Rob Bell on RESURRECTION! It’s a pretty sweet new video he put out! It’s free if you want to download it or read the script, or any of that good stuff. Check it out at RobBell.com
Resurrection: Rob Bell from The Work of Rob Bell on Vimeo.
I had the privilege of participating in a Good Friday service at my church today. The service focused on the 7 lasts words of Jesus. I was assigned the words;
“My God, My God, why have you forsaken me?”
I tried to read some of it from my paper and freestyle some it. Yea, it made me feel like a was learning to drive a stick shift, i got where i wanted to go but it was shaky and a little to stop and start. I should have just made an outline like i always do, Oh well.
Here are the thoughts i wrote out going into the meditation.
I feel like these thoughts are challenging and thought provoking. At least that’s what they were for me.
“My God, My God, why has thou forsaken me?”
(read Matthew 27:32-53)
Complexity and mysterious seems to be at their peek in this moment where God is crucified, fully present and hanging on a tree but at the same time, absent, turning His face from the sin being assumed by Jesus. We could theorize for weeks and years at this point but today isn’t a day for that, it simply a day to re-tell the story and ponder the words of Jesus.
In the middle of one of the hardest times in my life, when it seems like my world was imploding, The people I called family had abandoned me, I leaned into the Psalms and found one that lamented with me, that asked the questions I was asking and sought God in a way I was trying seek God.
The Psalms I leaned into begged the question, “what are the right sacrifices? These Psalms asked for Mercy, deliverance, and vindication as many of the them do. They asked for God to lead as He had in the past even though it seemed like He might not be anywhere to found.
I leaned into these songs and prayers because they echoed what my Soul felt, what I was longing for and they resonated with my circumstances.
In the middle of Jesus’ darkest moment and paradoxically the moment he was glorified or lifted the highest, he to leans into the Psalm, Psalm 22.
“My God, My God, why have you forsaken me?
Why are you so far from helping me, from the words of my groaning?”
Jesus is asking God, with as honest gasp and familiar prayer from the scriptures, “Father God, Where are you!”
verses 50-53
“And when Jesus had cried out again in a loud voice, he gave up his spirit.
At that moment the curtain of the temple was torn in two from top to bottom. The earth shook and the rocks split. The tombs broke open the bodies of the many holy people who had died were raised to life.
Kinda wild right?!?!
It’s in these cosmic moment that all has gone dark, as if everything, if only for these few moments has disappears and in it’s reemergence all of history has shifted. There is something different… There is a new nexus to all of human history, everything that happen before, we now know, wasn’t just linear history but it was a string of moments leading up to this moment. And everything that happens after this moment is situated in reference to this moment.
Human history no long has a beginning and an end. It has a middle.
History has been reoriented and it’s new center is the cross of Christ.
And as dark as this is, we find our self wanting to call this moment good news, and celebrate this dark day as, good Friday. A tension at best and mystery for sure.
And it’s in this central moment in human history that we find Jesus leaning into the Psalms, wondering where the father is, despairing maybe but hurting for sure!
And it’s also in this central moment in human history that we find our greatest fear and our greatest hope.
Our greatest fear is that God has or will abandoned us. If he was ever there in the first place.
Our greatest hope is that, this isn’t the end of the story for Jesus or for us. That in suffering there is hope, that this is really just a new center, a new beginning of sorts.
So where was God?
Will Willimon says; “It’s on the cross where we see the complexity of the way that this God saves us, the curious way in which God is with us.”
God didn’t save Jesus from the cross but he schemed of a way to make this event one that nobody would ever forget about, God schemed of a way for this horrific event of the cross, this political statement that was being made, he schemed of how he would subvert it’s message and proclaim a different statement, a statement of hope and victory.
It’s in this forth word from Jesus that we realize God is not like us humans and he does things very differently than we would want him to do things. Afterall, that’s why Jesus is on the Cross in the first place, right.
Willimon also says,
“We ask Jesus to stand up and act like God and he just hangs there.”
God chooses not to use coercion but love, service and self-sacrifice because they are his way.
It’s in our greatest darkness that God schemes of a way to subvert the message of despair that is being proclaimed in our lives and in our circumstances and to proclaim hope. He schemes and dreams of ways to bring light out of our darkness, and hope out of our despair, how to proclaim good news from all the moments of bad news we find ourselves living
And we remember that on all the Fridays of our lives, when with Jesus we want to say, “God where are you” maybe he is just hanging there, present and absent all at the same time, waiting for the sub-version of the story, of your story and ultimately His story to be proclaimed. After all Sunday isn’t far away.
Today was a studio day. Most of you know i do these little radio spots for WNAZ, a local radio station here in Nashville. I went in today and recorded 9 new spots.
My favorite one of the day is entitled SIDEWALK and asks the question, who do you think runs the world? I propose it’s the people who build the sidewalks.
When i get the audio i’ll post the spot!
Other than that i have a day of work ahead of me. I have tons of reviewing and writing to do today. I’ve read 2 books that i need to review, i have 3 new Don Miller DVD’s (the DVD’s) that i need to watch and review (OVER DUE) and i need to do some writing.
Let’s get on it!
Grace and peace
Erik